13 days and counting....

It's so hard to believe that in 13 short days the boys will be going back to school and our summer will be ending. What is even harder for me to believe is that in 13 days I will be sending BOTH of my babies to "big boy school" and will be by myself while they are at school and Alan is at work. I have yet to decide if I am ready for this next step in our life. The one where the years run together as Alex and Blake race through elementray school and before I know it they are entering middle school and then high school and then they leave the house. I dread going to work without them in tow...without them racing ahead of me to go hide beside the vending machine in the break room at work and me pretending to not know where they are. I dread not having them there at work where I can see them throughout their day and see what fun they are having or to be there if they get hurt. I will miss seeing them and hearing their little voices yelling "Mommy!" while they run up for a hug...

This year they will both gain new independence that they didnt have already. There will come a point when both of them will tell me that they dont need me to walk them in to the school anymore and I will cry as they walk together into the big school and while I pray that they made it to the right spot. Alex will relish in his new role of being the big brother at his school and show Blake where everyting is. Blake will do great and will love to learn new things, while Alex will do great, but will constantly be wondering when the weekend is or when it's his turn at the computer center.

So my countdown begins...13 days...to relish their laughs, their smiles, their personlaities and even their fights...because in 13 days I will walk them to school and they will forever be my little boys in big boy school.